tenthtimeisthecharm | (no subject)

[he pushes the door open, but stays standing in the entryway. seems he isn't entirely willing to just walk into her room when she's still sitting on the recharge slab. or-- at all, really. he doesn't make a habit of going to other people's personal habsuites.]

Then shall I consider this your formal request to be uninvited?

W-what? [Velocity's miserable expression goes slack with surprise, and she stares at Megatron] N-no, nothing like that. I still want to go, I do, I just. I-

[She curls up tighter on her bed and hugs her freshly repaired knees, off lining her optics hard so she wouldn't have to look at him at all when she says this next part] I, um. I went in a mission. Just the other day, and I'd never- I'd never done anything like that, and it went really really bad, the most bad, and- and I-

[She starts to say something else, but can't. Not that]

I just- I need a bit. Just a bit. Then everything will be back to normal.

[crossing his arms, he leans against the doorframe. cool guy pose, for the most uncool guy ever.]

Nothing in this damn universe goes well. [he says airily.] And now you have done it. Frankly, I wouldn't even say it went badly because this ship has, as of yet, not been detonated.

[he taps his fingers off his arm, optics narrowing as he watches her.]

We are leaving in a couple of weeks, and you have somehow managed to completely invert your obnoxious personality and lock yourself in your room. I need assurance that this will not be a problem because our mission is far too important to fail because any of us feel bad. [he pulls a datapad out his subspace, wiggling it between his index and middle fingers.] Company name from booking. See if you can't work some magic and find the manifest of other party goers.

[Velocity stared at him for the space of several seconds longer than she ever ordinarily would, her face going on a multiversal emotion journey through shock and irritation and back towards confusion before finally settling on some sort of begrudging curiosity. She didn't want to do that she wanted to stay in bed and hide longer, but now that he was here and dangling a distraction that was something practical and even helpful in front of her, something she understood and that didn't involve medical things or thinking about the recent past, she did have to admit she wanted to]

You're being very... everything right now, I'll have you know. [Muttered, as she gets out of bed and goes to take the datapad] Almost thinking of being mad at you, but you weren't trying hard enough at making fun of me. The others in the sorority were much better.

[oh, he looks so horribly pleased with himself for a few moments. don't you just want to smack that expression off his face? terrible.]

I have actually come here with a purpose, you know. [megatron points at the datapad, expression shifting back into his natural resting bitch face.] That of which was not to waste time insulting you. I don't need to show up in person to do that! Honestly.

[Velocity has started looking over the datapad, but does in fact snort out a weak laugh and wrinkle her nasal ridge] You are the worst, I'll have you know. Terrible, awful. And I'm sure so is whatever is on here. I'll do my best to wiggle out anything useful, but it- you-

[Another wrinkle and a frown as her brief lifting of her mood dissolves. Her next words are defensive, muttered down at the datapad] It wasn't just feeling bad, you know. Anybody would be knocked for a loop if they- [She swallows hard] If they shot one of their best friends right in the head. One of the only things I managed to do out there was hurt him.

[She looks away, hugging the datapad to her chest, then back at him] I'll work on it. I'll get a handle on this. Just don't say it like its nothing like that, okay? It was something. Is something. And it'll take adjusting to.

So I'm told.

[he still doesn't seem willing to come right into her room, so stays by the doorframe.

megatron stays silent for a long time before vaguely offering:] I spent most of my life hurting the mech I--

[it seems even admitting that he loves optimus out loud to anyone is still a bit beyond him. he cuts himself off before he says it.]

--don't underestimate the irritating Autobot willingness to forgive.

[he doesn't really know or want to say anything else on that.]

Good.

Velocity looked up at him with a start. "You-" Her mouth worked soundlessly for a moment as she realized where that statement had been going, and looked away. The expression on his face felt like something private she wasn't supposed to see. She wished again, not for the first time, that things were at least a little easier for her friends.

"He shouldn't have to," she said in an undertone, shoulders hunching to towards her audials. "But... Windblade told me once that wishing our people lived lives where nothing bad ever happened to them would be taking away their choices, or... words to that effect."

He looks away from her, expression crimped like he feels like he's said too much. Mostly because he does.

"She's correct in that instance," regardless of how he feels about Windblade, Megatron wouldn't say he doesn't hold some respect for her for the many feats she's been capable of. City Speakers are built different. "Terrible things will keep happening. You either accept this and learn how to remain functional while they do, or you let them overwhelm you and give up, then end up as another one of someone else's regrets."

It's not the warmest approach to it, but it's all he knows how to do.

"I- I don't want to ever be something someone else comes to regret," Velocity said softly, clutching the datapad closer. "Not ever. I know that's an impossibility when you factor in what the universe is like, but... people have hard enough lives already."

"Did I ever thank you for inviting me along?" She added with a ghost of a smile, less than subtly changing the subject. "I like spending time with you, yes, but also... this is important. Really important. I'd like the chance to do this kind of thing sometimes... if that makes sense at all?"

She will, inevitably, as most people do, but he opts not to mention that. Megatron knows he is the regret of many people. Optimus, for the old fool's insufferable insistence on taking responsibility for all ills he's ever encountered. Countless Autobots and Decepticons for not doing him in. For letting him take their friends away from them.

"Medics being part of an away team is simple common sense, nothing more, nothing less," he grumbles, though he obviously thinks she's capable for her to be the one he asked. Not that he says as much. "We will not fail, and perhaps might even find ourselves one step closer to achieving any sort of worthwhile goal in this damn universe."

Velocity nodded again, easing a bit from her stiff posture. "Getting the matrix back, right? Did I ever tell you that's what one of my thesis papers was about? How the relationships of cojunx and amica endura effected the matrix itself just as much as it does the one who carries it. It was interesting stuff, or- or at least I thought so at the time."

She aimed a smile down at his feet. "You're um. You're really nice, you know? Though I think you think you're anything but, a lot of the time."

"No, you didn't," he says, tilting his head in something that could be polite interest if he wasn't someone who was known for... not expressing any degree of interest politely. "I don't know what conjunx and amica endura is. Are they illnesses? How did you get the Matrix readings?"

Ah-- not entirely important. His expression blanches then pinches at what she says, looking away. At least she's agreed to do what he's told her to do, he tells himself.

"You need better standards."

Velocity perked up at the questions and drew in a big vent. "They're sort of... Well, in my universe, conjunx endura and amica endura are the formalized recognition of romantic and platonic bonds in our society. On the surface it's just the next step of a relationship, but as my research proved, it's goes so so much deeper than that! It sounds wonderful, doesn't it?" She asked dreamily. "Either one of them? I would love to just, I don't know..."

Her smile faltered, and she hugged an arm to herself, because she knew herself well enough to know that no one would ever want to do either of those things with her. You didn't spend almost your entire life being mocked and overlooked without it making a few things crystal clear.

"...Well, the important part is that our society recognizes these bonds as important, and confer legal rights and so forth. Oh! And I got readings on the matrix by sort of... Um. Have you ever gotten readings on something by observing its effects on something else, like gravity wells or quantum anything? That's the idea. So whenever we said or did certain things to the matrix carrier, we observed the reactions in their conjunx and amica endura who were several buildings away. Fascinating stuff, it-"

She faltered again, then tilted her head, looking back at him with a blink. "If better standards mean I'll think different things about you, then I want to stay the way I am," she said simply.

Edited 2023-11-03 04:41 (UTC)

"I don't understand why those need to become complicated by legal matters..." he mutters, but shakes it off. He doesn't really want to think too hard about people and their bonds when his own is all but broken by the bridge. His hand goes to his chest before he thinks about it, that little habit of his like he doesn't want to forget the handprint on his chest, or how it burned all the way down to his spark.

Probably best not to get a spark scan any time soon. That's not a mess he wants to deal with. It'll probably go away if he keeps ignoring it.

"Insufferable. Contact me when you have some results."